This BBC article expertly espouses that patience with the modern way of attending a gig and filming it on your smartphone, has worn thin.
Holding a phone aloft or sitting on your boyfriend's shoulders - both show a total lack of respect to those around you who have paid high prices to watch a live show.
This attitude is far too common in modern day society: playing music on a bus, using a mobile in a quiet zone on a train, sending and receiving texts during a theatrical performance. It's the "me, me" selfish society we now live in.
Indeed, I despise these people who think nothing of imposing their presence upon the rest of us, and would advocate a sense of citizen justice.
Haul the girl onto the floor, and when the boyfriend attempts to defend her, he is kicked to the deck by a mob...Both are then handed an A4 sheet of paper, upon which is written their transgressions.
Snatch and then over-arm throw the smart throw into the crowd if one is suddenly thrust into your line of sight. "You lost your phone because you're a selfish prick!" Any attempts to start a fight will be snuffed out by the mob kicking the smart phone transgressor to the floor. Repeat A4 sheet.
Somebody ruining the quiet zone on a train, gather a crowd and then choke that person with a tie until they pass out.
Sending a text during a performance, your phone will be snapped in two in front of you.
Harsh? Yes. But ask yourself this question...Would you fall foul of my system? If so, then you're an idiot who lacks self awareness and respect for others and you deserve a damned good kicking.
Friday, 12 April 2013
Monday, 8 April 2013
Margaret Thatcher.
She was a polarising figure, that much is evident!
Thing is, polarising figure means that they're loved and hated in equal measure...Surely this is a good thing? It means there is a natural divide to vote for, not like today where identikit men in suits battle over the same turf because they want everybody to love them equally.
Walking the centre ground is asinine and boring simply because by walking the centre ground, you offend both sides of the political divide equally, and hence doom your country to endless coalition and ineffective governance.
Remember this, for all people seemed to hate Thatcher, she won three elections. Cue various theories as to why this is, usually citing the Falklands and Kinnocks meltdown speech. Nobody states "She won because of the superior number of votes her party received." I also think, people remembered this.
Thing is, polarising figure means that they're loved and hated in equal measure...Surely this is a good thing? It means there is a natural divide to vote for, not like today where identikit men in suits battle over the same turf because they want everybody to love them equally.
Walking the centre ground is asinine and boring simply because by walking the centre ground, you offend both sides of the political divide equally, and hence doom your country to endless coalition and ineffective governance.
Remember this, for all people seemed to hate Thatcher, she won three elections. Cue various theories as to why this is, usually citing the Falklands and Kinnocks meltdown speech. Nobody states "She won because of the superior number of votes her party received." I also think, people remembered this.
Thursday, 4 April 2013
This is the End
North Korea, home of the lard assed man child in charge of a twitchy hated nation, will attempt to nuke nuke the USA.
I predict a bit of a cluster-fuck will ensue.
Most other countries will stand their ground, agog, for 24 hours to work out what exactly is happening and digest the rolling news footage of unimaginable carnage and then Israel will take the opportunity to attack Iran/Syria.
China and Russia who were silent whilst North Korea received the justice due its leaders, but not the people (although innocent people always die in war, sadly), will defend Iran and Syria
The war will spread, the USA will demand a cessation to hostilities, China and Russia will point to the crater that is North Korea, Iran and Syria and simply say they're stopping the rot. The USA will not take this insult well, nor will NATO.
WWIII...or something like that.
Well
This whole cluster-fuck will take place in slow motion, and I will sit and watch the mushrooms growing from a hilltop...Whilst Massive Attack's Teardrop surrounds me until oblivion.
Saturday, 23 February 2013
Ratings cut humiliating, says Labour
Well they would wouldn't they? The bunch of bellends.
Inheriting a stable economy, gaining an unfounded reputation as an Iron Chancellor, and then turning on the borrowed money taps in about 1999. Spending more than we earned until the wheels fell off the wagon in 2008, and then thinking that spending yet more money would be a great idea to save everything. "Hey, let's throw good money after bad, that'll work!" Cue total loss of face, but since the Tory party have always been the party that tries to live within our means, everybody hates them to a greater or lesser extent. We want the fun party back, the party that pisses money at every needy mouth in order to buy votes. Yey.
So this was going to be a rant about ratings agencies, and what a bunch of pricks they are...Playing a self fulfilling game must be so easy, just ask George Soros. Does what he wants, and since every swinging dick stock broker watches him and follows him, he can set the trends every-time. Gee, wonder how he does it? You fucking idiots. One day, ignore him and take him to the cleaners. Anyway, ratings agencies. Vote me, and I'd send black clad special forces guys to abduct all the MDs and senior decision makers, and just bury them in a ditch somewhere after hours of spectacularly excruciating torture. Screw my country over would you? Force the honest taxpayers to pick up the bill? Suffer.
Inheriting a stable economy, gaining an unfounded reputation as an Iron Chancellor, and then turning on the borrowed money taps in about 1999. Spending more than we earned until the wheels fell off the wagon in 2008, and then thinking that spending yet more money would be a great idea to save everything. "Hey, let's throw good money after bad, that'll work!" Cue total loss of face, but since the Tory party have always been the party that tries to live within our means, everybody hates them to a greater or lesser extent. We want the fun party back, the party that pisses money at every needy mouth in order to buy votes. Yey.
So this was going to be a rant about ratings agencies, and what a bunch of pricks they are...Playing a self fulfilling game must be so easy, just ask George Soros. Does what he wants, and since every swinging dick stock broker watches him and follows him, he can set the trends every-time. Gee, wonder how he does it? You fucking idiots. One day, ignore him and take him to the cleaners. Anyway, ratings agencies. Vote me, and I'd send black clad special forces guys to abduct all the MDs and senior decision makers, and just bury them in a ditch somewhere after hours of spectacularly excruciating torture. Screw my country over would you? Force the honest taxpayers to pick up the bill? Suffer.
Saturday, 16 February 2013
What do you do with a drunken sailor?
"Figures obtained by the BBC show that there have been more than 300 disciplinary incidents in the past three years on the navy's 13 submarines, including 42 cases of misconduct or unfitness through alcohol or drugs."
Now. I know why the BBC is doing this. Some wanky arsed little journalist type, who is anti-military and probably heavily left-wing, thinks the public should not vote for replacing Trident. Hence, this is a little dig, aimed at showing that the Navy is incompetent and/or incapable of handling weapons of such destructive force as the nuke.
The reasons to keep the nuke are simple.
I do know that there are liberals out there who think we'd carry on as normal without the nuke, but we wouldn't. No we wouldn't. Far more goes on behind the scenes than you'd ever realise. So, this piece intends to highlight that the navy is bad m-kay. Well, prepare your anus journalist. These figures you have obtained demonstrate to me that the system works. Drunken people are apprehended and punished appropriately, you have provided a list of figures that prove this. End of discussion. Learn more.
The reasons to keep the nuke are simple.
- The UK is no longer an imperial power.
- The world is becoming increasingly unstable.
- We will be fighting over resources soon enough.
- Iran, N. Korea would have no qualms about first strike...Can't let those zealots take all.
- The Iranian government is run by a death cult that prefers the afterlife to life.
- We would have no say in global affairs without the biggest stick of all in our back pocket.
I do know that there are liberals out there who think we'd carry on as normal without the nuke, but we wouldn't. No we wouldn't. Far more goes on behind the scenes than you'd ever realise. So, this piece intends to highlight that the navy is bad m-kay. Well, prepare your anus journalist. These figures you have obtained demonstrate to me that the system works. Drunken people are apprehended and punished appropriately, you have provided a list of figures that prove this. End of discussion. Learn more.
Thursday, 14 February 2013
The Great Horsemeat Scandal
When I was a child, I used to eat horse meat. Shock, horror, you animal...How dare you eat the lovely Gee-gees.
Know what? They taste fabulous, horse meat frikadellen from a German deli, mmm-mmm. At least twice a month, mum would have horsey frikadellen in the carrier bags, or we'd go get some from the schnelly. Plenty of iron, an intense 'meaty' flavour like you have added stock cubes to your ground beef, nothing wrong with it at all.
So, to arise every morning and complete my morning ritual with Susanna Reid and Sally Nugent teasing me in short skirts, and find that people are screaming blue murder about horse meat being in their value mince...Well, fuck. What is the problem people? Why does 'health' keep getting bandied around? horse meat isn't crawling with disease you know, just because it is horse. Why do obese northern mothers (my mum is northern and not obese) keep appearing on my screen, with their snot nosed little turdy children alongside them, mouths ragged and raw from chowing down on high sugar and acidic artificial confectionery; demanding that the government think of the children and pillory some slaughterhouse manager... Or give them more free money.
Dear Mr. Government. My little Jayden (a shit modern name, usually coupled to a poorly behaved specimen of troublesome humanity, fit only for the salt mines) ate some horses meat at school. Give me free monies or I will sue you. The nice man in the shiny suit says I can put a case on you.
FUCK OFF you idiots. Why the objection to eating horse? Granted the deception could be a trifle irritating, like if you purchase a phone online, and the arse-goblin in some feckless third world shithole sends you a photograph of a phone...I would go to war over that. I would wipe out your country with nuclear fire just to ensure I got you for the insult, you turd...Anyway where was I? Oh yes. The deception can be annoying. You purchase cheap beef mince, and 90% of it is horse. But unless somebody tells you, do you really know the difference? Unless the meat smells off, and/or has things wriggling about in it, it is very unlikely to do you harm. If anything, horse meat is likely to be better for you, containing less fats and more minerals/vitamins. But no need to keep off over a deception, no need to call it a scandal. Just say "oh you, silly sods, here's a fine and next time label your product!" Don't put the firm out of business, because those are people's jobs at the end of the day...Fine the owner his sodding great car or house.
Plus, would it hurt the people of the UK to broaden their palette a little? In a time of increasing competition for food and resources, declaring whole swathes of the animal kingdom as 'off menu' because historically we don't eat that thing over there, we eat them things over there, just seems a little odd. You know my theory on the matter, there are too many people and yes I am qualified to decide who lives and dies. You need only observe the High Street on a Friday night, and perhaps watch driving behaviour in any town centre around Christmas. So yes, unless we start prohibiting breeding and culling the feckless thick fucks, pretty soon we shall start adding cats and dogs to the menu because Earth cannot support all of us indefinitely.
Bring on the horse meat, tasty, lean, cheap.
Know what? They taste fabulous, horse meat frikadellen from a German deli, mmm-mmm. At least twice a month, mum would have horsey frikadellen in the carrier bags, or we'd go get some from the schnelly. Plenty of iron, an intense 'meaty' flavour like you have added stock cubes to your ground beef, nothing wrong with it at all.
So, to arise every morning and complete my morning ritual with Susanna Reid and Sally Nugent teasing me in short skirts, and find that people are screaming blue murder about horse meat being in their value mince...Well, fuck. What is the problem people? Why does 'health' keep getting bandied around? horse meat isn't crawling with disease you know, just because it is horse. Why do obese northern mothers (my mum is northern and not obese) keep appearing on my screen, with their snot nosed little turdy children alongside them, mouths ragged and raw from chowing down on high sugar and acidic artificial confectionery; demanding that the government think of the children and pillory some slaughterhouse manager... Or give them more free money.
Dear Mr. Government. My little Jayden (a shit modern name, usually coupled to a poorly behaved specimen of troublesome humanity, fit only for the salt mines) ate some horses meat at school. Give me free monies or I will sue you. The nice man in the shiny suit says I can put a case on you.
FUCK OFF you idiots. Why the objection to eating horse? Granted the deception could be a trifle irritating, like if you purchase a phone online, and the arse-goblin in some feckless third world shithole sends you a photograph of a phone...I would go to war over that. I would wipe out your country with nuclear fire just to ensure I got you for the insult, you turd...Anyway where was I? Oh yes. The deception can be annoying. You purchase cheap beef mince, and 90% of it is horse. But unless somebody tells you, do you really know the difference? Unless the meat smells off, and/or has things wriggling about in it, it is very unlikely to do you harm. If anything, horse meat is likely to be better for you, containing less fats and more minerals/vitamins. But no need to keep off over a deception, no need to call it a scandal. Just say "oh you, silly sods, here's a fine and next time label your product!" Don't put the firm out of business, because those are people's jobs at the end of the day...Fine the owner his sodding great car or house.
Plus, would it hurt the people of the UK to broaden their palette a little? In a time of increasing competition for food and resources, declaring whole swathes of the animal kingdom as 'off menu' because historically we don't eat that thing over there, we eat them things over there, just seems a little odd. You know my theory on the matter, there are too many people and yes I am qualified to decide who lives and dies. You need only observe the High Street on a Friday night, and perhaps watch driving behaviour in any town centre around Christmas. So yes, unless we start prohibiting breeding and culling the feckless thick fucks, pretty soon we shall start adding cats and dogs to the menu because Earth cannot support all of us indefinitely.
Bring on the horse meat, tasty, lean, cheap.
Monday, 28 January 2013
HS2 Again
So, the government has published the first details of the northern extension of HS2, and the predictable arsehole NIMBYs are already out trying to overturn something they know nothing about.
Now, the BBC as an unbiased and balanced broadcaster, is duty bound to present both sides of the fence...However, this approach means that no nothing idiots and their baseless ideas are given an air of credibility because they have been on the BBC. What should happen is, if your point of view differs, but is factually incorrect and/or mislead, you should be laughed off of the BBC...And shot (under my regime).
Let us have a look at the anti-HS2 bullshit claims postulated by these absolute morons. Now, I know people are supposed to have reasoned debate and agree to disagree, but I disagree with that sentiment. I feel that by allowing everybody believe their opinion is of equal weight and merit, you encourage dickheads to open their mouth and cost the taxpayer billions in wasted effort and legal battles. You also have to listen to these people without having the right to demand they be vanned into the fens and disposed of in a ditch. I digress...time to direct my disbelief and venom at the airheads of Stop HS2 et al.
Many of these *cough* bullshit *cough* facts can be viewed here.
We operate a hundred+ year old railway network, that has been botched and cobbled together...It works, but is approaching capacity. Apparently, you can improve the network today for £2bn...Really? Do you remember the recent upgrade of the WCML that failed to deliver, and disrupted travel for about 10 years? Imagine this happening again....Go on...Years of disruption, service stoppages, weekend possessions a bodge job, a half measure. HS2 would be a new build, allowing the WCML to run freely in the interim construction period. Plus there would be a new diversion route for maintenance, redundancy in the network is always good...Witness what happens when somebody tops themselves on the line, and everybody is stuck in London for hours. With two routes, duplicating the ECML and WCML, you're sorted for alternatives.
What 'stop HS2' (no caps, fuck 'em) fail to realise when they come out with their tired old socialist shit about the line only benefiting businessmen etc, is that building HS2 frees up oodles of space on the WCML (and to a lesser extent the MML and ECML) to provide for slower freight and stopping passenger services. These will benefit local communities AND take trucks off of the motorways, an environmental benefit surely since slow moving freight is a pain in the ass on the motorways what with trucks elephant racing. The DfT's rail package 2 does not deliver all the benefits of HS2...It just doesn't, stop deluding yourselves.
The benefits will also flow to London, according to stop HS2...Really? Ever heard of the suburbs? They are large areas of land that were covered in houses and shops (I'll talk to you like an idiot if you think like one), mainly in the 30s, as a result in the growth of rapid transport connecting those places to London. Compare Watford in the 30s with Watford today (there are numerous other examples)...You'll find that Watford is much bigger and more prosperous than it was in the 30s because its population can travel into London for work. If people choose to live in Birmingham and commute to London then great, those people who live in Birmingham will have more pennies in their pocket to spend IN Birmingham, hence leading to a growth in the commercial and services sector that provide for those people. There will be benefit. Likewise connecting cities to Birmingham will open further opportunities for the regional hinterland to trade together...Not to mention the increased ability to pump railfreight back and forth down the traditional network.
It is pointed out that more people will travel if HS2 is built = bad for the environment m'kay...You know what? Fuck you. People need to travel to work, in order to grow and prosper...If you're a comfortably well off middle class NIMBY who has achieved a certain level of success in your life, then who are you to deny millions of other people the chance to climb the ladder like you have. Fuck you you selfish dicks. I hope you choke in your retirement and stop draining the tax pot for the rest of us.
NIMBYs also like to point to HS1 as an example of a failed project...Any system can be considered a failure if only part of it is built. HS1 will become more valuable once plumbed into Crossrail, HS2, (potential CR2 and HS3)...I am reminded of how anti-roads dickbags fuck up road improvement schemes, and then use the resultant over budget half measure as 'proof' that road building is flawed and expensive. It is, if you sabotage it...If you bump the cost up by using the tactics published in your road protest handbook, to enforce expensive judicial reviews (lots of money for you NIMBY dickbags parents i.e. lawyers) and then make it miss its planning window so the work has to be repeated and incorporate new standards at extra cost to the taxpayer etc then of course it will be seen as a waste of money. The cost is the fault of the protesters not the engineers and professionals or government.
Frankly, I am sick of interest groups holding the taxpayer to ransom. Interest groups that exploit the inability of people who are 'pro' something to get off their arse and protest 'for' something. It's human nature to scream and shout against something, but do nothing if you support something. Dickbag protestors shouldn't take this silence as support, because it isn't. I imagine millions of people are chuffed to see the government getting of their backsides and planning long term. In cohorts with the electric spine and the Great Western Mainline being improved etc, I am happy to see progress...And I dislike people who intend to fuck it up on the basis of half truths and prejudice.
You are welcome to disagree, but I'll just 'know' you are a prick if you do, and not worth my energy. You are not entitled to your opinion you arse goblin.
Now, the BBC as an unbiased and balanced broadcaster, is duty bound to present both sides of the fence...However, this approach means that no nothing idiots and their baseless ideas are given an air of credibility because they have been on the BBC. What should happen is, if your point of view differs, but is factually incorrect and/or mislead, you should be laughed off of the BBC...And shot (under my regime).
Let us have a look at the anti-HS2 bullshit claims postulated by these absolute morons. Now, I know people are supposed to have reasoned debate and agree to disagree, but I disagree with that sentiment. I feel that by allowing everybody believe their opinion is of equal weight and merit, you encourage dickheads to open their mouth and cost the taxpayer billions in wasted effort and legal battles. You also have to listen to these people without having the right to demand they be vanned into the fens and disposed of in a ditch. I digress...time to direct my disbelief and venom at the airheads of Stop HS2 et al.
Many of these *cough* bullshit *cough* facts can be viewed here.
We operate a hundred+ year old railway network, that has been botched and cobbled together...It works, but is approaching capacity. Apparently, you can improve the network today for £2bn...Really? Do you remember the recent upgrade of the WCML that failed to deliver, and disrupted travel for about 10 years? Imagine this happening again....Go on...Years of disruption, service stoppages, weekend possessions a bodge job, a half measure. HS2 would be a new build, allowing the WCML to run freely in the interim construction period. Plus there would be a new diversion route for maintenance, redundancy in the network is always good...Witness what happens when somebody tops themselves on the line, and everybody is stuck in London for hours. With two routes, duplicating the ECML and WCML, you're sorted for alternatives.
What 'stop HS2' (no caps, fuck 'em) fail to realise when they come out with their tired old socialist shit about the line only benefiting businessmen etc, is that building HS2 frees up oodles of space on the WCML (and to a lesser extent the MML and ECML) to provide for slower freight and stopping passenger services. These will benefit local communities AND take trucks off of the motorways, an environmental benefit surely since slow moving freight is a pain in the ass on the motorways what with trucks elephant racing. The DfT's rail package 2 does not deliver all the benefits of HS2...It just doesn't, stop deluding yourselves.
The benefits will also flow to London, according to stop HS2...Really? Ever heard of the suburbs? They are large areas of land that were covered in houses and shops (I'll talk to you like an idiot if you think like one), mainly in the 30s, as a result in the growth of rapid transport connecting those places to London. Compare Watford in the 30s with Watford today (there are numerous other examples)...You'll find that Watford is much bigger and more prosperous than it was in the 30s because its population can travel into London for work. If people choose to live in Birmingham and commute to London then great, those people who live in Birmingham will have more pennies in their pocket to spend IN Birmingham, hence leading to a growth in the commercial and services sector that provide for those people. There will be benefit. Likewise connecting cities to Birmingham will open further opportunities for the regional hinterland to trade together...Not to mention the increased ability to pump railfreight back and forth down the traditional network.
It is pointed out that more people will travel if HS2 is built = bad for the environment m'kay...You know what? Fuck you. People need to travel to work, in order to grow and prosper...If you're a comfortably well off middle class NIMBY who has achieved a certain level of success in your life, then who are you to deny millions of other people the chance to climb the ladder like you have. Fuck you you selfish dicks. I hope you choke in your retirement and stop draining the tax pot for the rest of us.
NIMBYs also like to point to HS1 as an example of a failed project...Any system can be considered a failure if only part of it is built. HS1 will become more valuable once plumbed into Crossrail, HS2, (potential CR2 and HS3)...I am reminded of how anti-roads dickbags fuck up road improvement schemes, and then use the resultant over budget half measure as 'proof' that road building is flawed and expensive. It is, if you sabotage it...If you bump the cost up by using the tactics published in your road protest handbook, to enforce expensive judicial reviews (lots of money for you NIMBY dickbags parents i.e. lawyers) and then make it miss its planning window so the work has to be repeated and incorporate new standards at extra cost to the taxpayer etc then of course it will be seen as a waste of money. The cost is the fault of the protesters not the engineers and professionals or government.
Frankly, I am sick of interest groups holding the taxpayer to ransom. Interest groups that exploit the inability of people who are 'pro' something to get off their arse and protest 'for' something. It's human nature to scream and shout against something, but do nothing if you support something. Dickbag protestors shouldn't take this silence as support, because it isn't. I imagine millions of people are chuffed to see the government getting of their backsides and planning long term. In cohorts with the electric spine and the Great Western Mainline being improved etc, I am happy to see progress...And I dislike people who intend to fuck it up on the basis of half truths and prejudice.
You are welcome to disagree, but I'll just 'know' you are a prick if you do, and not worth my energy. You are not entitled to your opinion you arse goblin.
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